The Perfect Companion

Drive late night. Listen- Late Goodbye.

Unrequited Love Pt. II

 















You dont know what you want yourself,
You dont know what you want in someone else,
If you look beyond your pain alone,
You'd see there's more to it than I can show

Hanging by your words, I found comfort
How was I to know you never meant a word of it?
I put in every bit of my last effort,
But your mind was already set; none could amend it.

I've been patient through it all,
Ask yourself too. Have you?
A sole string held us from our fall
You pushed me to it so I cut it.

You say you've loved but you think you lost it
Dig all you want but you'l never unearth it
I gave you love but you didn't think it was worth it
Desire love now only if you deserve it.

At the end of the day, I wish you had stayed
Not washed your hands clean and walk away
Loving is always easy to preach but not easy to do
And I'll be forever waiting on you.

That Day I Just Couldn't Stop Typing...Today.

The End.

Sometimes, starting with what you should be finishing off with, would best express the plethora of thoughts and emotions inside you. I will not restrict this to your heart or mind alone. This is plainly food for thought so keep yourself open for every sensation that comes over you.

I'm sure you've had the nightmare of being stuck in a long winding, dark tunnel that has no end to it. You wave your hands wildly, in the hope of bumping into something solid- maybe a door or an escape route from this pitch-dark confinement you've been put in. Catching the smallest glimpse of light along this never-ending tunnel would give you the drive you need to run to it, and free yourself of the veil of darkness that has been thrown over you. Generally, waking up from your deep sleep is consequent to reaching the light. You gasp for breath, pinch yourself and assure yourself it was only a dream and then fall back to sleep.

Breaking away from the stereotype, have you ever dreamt about a circumstance where- instead of being stuck in a dark tunnel, you find yourself in a dazzling, bright place that LEADS TO the dark tunnel I've about? This is one step before your normal dream, isn't it? Here is where I am. You may think I'm some suicidal sonnuvagun for all that I'm cooking up in my head. Note for the ignorant: consider this a suicide wish then,   you narrow-minded idiot. Back to my mental crap- iridescent as it may seem, I don't think belong here in the bright place right now. My conscience tells me to walk on. Yes, into the dark if it may be, but still, walk on. Wait, this just in-  

And if the darkness is to keep us apart

And if the daylight feels like its a long way off

And if your glass heart should crack

And for a second you turn back

Oh no, be strong, 

Walk on, walk on...

              

                 U2 - "Walk On"

... That just randomly hit me in the head. The ways in which music can relate to our emotions is infinite and totally mindblowing. I've always been fascinated by this art. Anyhow, going back to where we were- the dark tunnel. Going along the skeletal figure of what I mean makes my words must ambiguous to you, so I'll open up to you. We all have a bright place- our comfort zone, where nothing can go wrong and everything seems perfect. The dark tunnel is the rude awakening you receive to shake you loose from this lucid dream. Reluctant as you are, walk on. The tunnel has a brighter and more spacious place ahead of it for you. If you're in your bright place with no dark tunnel ahead of you, don't be a moron and go searching for it. Enter it when it comes to you. And believe me, it WILL come to you. No one has the perfect life. In my belief, there is imperfection even in perfection... though I shall strive for perfection still! The dark place comes to each of us in many forms- a bitter experience you keep only to yourself, the death of a dear one that has scarred you, getting your heart broken etc. Jeopardise yourself in the dark tunnel when you are left with no option. Reluctance and refusal to move on will only weigh you down further.

Though all of this is easy to talk about, it certainly isn't piece of cake to actually undergo it. But going ahead with it with an open heart and clear mind would be the best decision you can make. You can tell my about a higher power, the bigger scheme of things and how things are what they are because they're meant to be, but I'd prefer to take it up one issue at a time. From the very little experience I've gathered I have understood that- It is what YOU want it to be. Now, feel free to replace 'it' with anything you want, be it- you, your life, your love, your happiness, your sorrow, your misery... anything. Take this mini-mantra with you and experiment with it. "Its not meant to be" is a phrase either you or your conscience cooks up to avoid a confrontation, be it voluntarily or involuntarily. Think with your mind and love with your heart. Don't get it mixed up when you make your choices.

The reason why I'm yapping about the metaphysical and the like is simple- I was listen to The End by The Doors when I was entering my dark phase. Interpreting Morrison's lyrics blew me over to this illusion of the tunnel and a bright place which, now I understand, is a crossroad all of us reach at some or many points in our lives. Penning down every inference I make of this experience seems to be the best way to help me tackle the tunnel. All that I'm saying may seem random and crazy to you but I kid you not- I'm not drunk, I'm not stoned. I'm just a sober chap caught up in self-introspection. Anyhow, enough of my rambling. Put your thinking hats on now. Oh wait, I think I lost mine.

"This is the end

Beautiful friend

This is the end

My only friend, the end

Of our elaborate plans, the end

Of everything that stands, the end

No safety or surprise, the end

I'll never look into your eyes... again."




 














Jim Morrison: an eye-opener for many, though he couldn't keep 
his eyes open himself; Refer: Stoned.


Edit (11th Dec. 2010): A brief reading of this post after 24 hours makes me realise that what I wrote almost sounds like the drug-deprived, depressing bullsh*t you see in the movies. Wtf? In all its senselessness and absurdity, I still wish to hold it as a memory of the torrent of emotions I've undergone. Some people feel more than others. I guess I'm in that bunch. Whoopie.